


Deleted scenes

by JustYourAverageFanboy



Series: Stopping Time [3]
Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst, Fluff, Intrusive Thoughts, Kissing, M/M, Panic Attacks, one shots, sibling bonding time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-08
Updated: 2017-08-17
Packaged: 2018-12-13 00:36:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11748453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustYourAverageFanboy/pseuds/JustYourAverageFanboy
Summary: Deleted scenes from my fic Stopping Time





	1. Halloween

**Author's Note:**

> All of the chapters in this take place after chapter 23 but before the epilogue (except for the first chapter)

Evan was singing along to his Halloween music playlist as he quickly fixed his face paint. Normally, he would've had his mother do it for him but she had to work and wouldn't be home until three in the morning. He wasn't the best at face paint, but he certainly wasn't terrible.

He was painting his face to look like his skin was falling off, revealing a skull and blood. He had found an old Halloween mask from a few years back and cut it apart to use some of the rubber to make it seem like skin was actually falling off. It didn't match his skin tone, but it would have to do. He had it taped to his face. Glueing it on would've been hard. It would've hurt to take off. They didn't have glue in the first place.

The doorbell rang, making Evan jump and accidentally swipe some red paint across his nose. He set down the brush and walked downstairs. He picked up the bowl of candy and opened the door.

"Trick or treat!" a little girl said, holding out a pillow case. She was dressed up as Cinderella.

Evan smiled and grabbed four pieces of candy, putting them in the pillow case.

"Evan?"

Evan looked up, seeing Alana standing behind the little girl. Alana was dressed up as Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz.

"O-oh, hey A-Alana," Evan said.

"I didn't know you lived here," she said.

"Y-yeah."

"This is my sister, Elizabeth." Alana put her hands on the little girls' shoulder, looking at her. "I'm taking her trick or treating because my parents aren't able to." She looked at Evan. "I really like your face paint."

"R-really?" Evan asked. "I-I'm n-not as good a-as my mom, but th-thanks."

Alana nodded. "Well, happy Halloween!" She smiled and walked down the porch, Elizabeth following close behind.

"W-wait!" Evan dug around in the bowl before bounding down the porch steps. He handed Alana a red tootsie pop. "H-here."

"Oh," Alana said, surprised. She grinned and took the candy. "Thank you Evan."

"H-have a good night," he called as he watched them leave.

Evan was about to go back into the house when a dark figure approached. He stared at the person, heart beating. He backed up.

"Relax, Hansen. It's just me." Connor walked up the porch, putting his hood down.

Evan let out a breath, placing a hand on his chest. "D-don't scare me like that."

"Isn't that the point of Halloween?" Connor asked, leaning against the doorframe. "Nice face paint. Didn't you say that you could do mine?"

"O-oh, you s-still want me to do that?" Evan asked. "Come on."

He pulled Connor up to the bathroom, having him sit on the toilet.

"Do you have anything specific in mind?"

Connor shrugged, picking at his nails. "Anything scary, I guess."

Evan nodded and began looking through the paint. He bit his lip and glanced over at Connor. He walked over to the cabinet on the wall next to the mirror and opened it. He took out a hair tie and tossed it to Connor.

Getting the hint, Connor tied his hair into a bun.

Evan walked over to Connor, arms full with paint. He set the paint on the edge of the tub, kneeled down so he was eyelevel with Connor, and began painting.

 

It took an hour. Unless you count the breaks in between to answer the door for trick or treaters, then it took two hours.

Connor was looking at himself in he mirror. "Damn," he whispered. "That's pretty cool."

Evan decided on making it look like Connor had gotten shot multiple times in the head. His chin was painted so it looked like it was showing some chipped skull. Near the forehead, it looked like some brain was scattered everywhere.

"I-it's not my best, but it's all I could do," Evan said, shrugging. Evan had moved the paint back to the sink so he could finish his own face when the doorbell rang.

"Ill get it," Connor said, leaving the bathroom.

It didn't take Evan long. He just needed to add a bit more detail to the blood and work on his right eye. He was trying to make it seem like his eye was falling out of its socket.

He washed his hands when he was done and quickly put away the paint. He ran downstairs and saw Connor standing in the doorway.

"I'm just saying, he should get a job in face painting," someone said.

Evan walked over and peered over Connor's shoulder. Jared was standing next to a kid.

"Speaking of Evan," Jared said. "God damn, Evan. How long did that take you?"

"A-about an hour or so." Evan shrugged. He looked at the kid. "H-hi Alex."

Alex waved. Alex was Jared's younger cousin. He was a quiet kid and only spoke when he couldn't answer a question with a yes or no.

"Remind you of anyone," Jared would always joke when they were kids.

"I was just gonna drop him off at home after this house," Jared said. "I'll be back in about ten minutes. Save some candy for me."

Connor rolled his eyes and shut the door. He took a Kit Kay from the bowl. "So what now?" he asked, unwrapping the treat.

"I don't know," Evan answered. "We could put on a scary movie."

"Or we could do a Halloween photo shoot," Connor suggested.

"You do photography?"

"In my spare time. I don't have a professional camera, so I use my phone. But I'd like to think I take good pictures."

So that's what they did. For the next ten minutes, they took pictures of them in the most ridiculous poses. Most of the ones with Connor had him laying somewhere, dead. The ones with Evan had him holding a lighter close to his face, much to his discomfort, like he was burning his skin.

When Jared returned, they ended up having him pretend to find them and be scared.

Jared and Connor ended up exchanging phone numbers so that Connor could text him the pictures. Jared took most of the pictures and posted them on his Instagram, tagging both Evan and Connor in them and crediting Connor for the pictures and Evan for the face paint. Evan ended up getting a few followers and compliments on the painting.

It was around ten when they decided to watch horror movies. Even if Evan was uncomfortable, it was a tradition of his and Jared's to watch at least one scary movie on Halloween.

They each picked a movie. Evan picked the Babadook, Jared picked the Sixth sense, and Connor picked Nightmare on Elm Street. They started with the Sixth Sense.

 

The main reason why Evan never watched horror movies was because he would never be able to sleep. So there he was, sitting against the wall.

Connor had fallen asleep on the couch during the Babadook. Jared had left when it was over, but not before eating most of the left over candy. And Evan wasn't about to watch a horror movie by himself, so they never watched Connor's choice.

Evan stood up and walked to the kitchen. He turned on the small light above the sink before turning to the fridge. He opened it and grabbed the almost empty milk carton.

The front door creaked. Evan spun around, almost dropping the carton, and stared at the door. He could barely see the door handle jiggle. He backed up until his back met the counter.

The door opened. Evan was about to run upstairs when he saw Heidi step inside. He let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding and made his way over to his mother.

She was startled, looking up. "Oh, jeez," she laughed, pressing a palm to her chest. "What are you doing up so late, sweetie?"

"I-I couldn't s-sleep," Evan whispered, trying to not wake up Connor. "J-Jared and Connor c-came over a-and we ended up watching h-horror movies."

"Oh." Heidi nodded. "Well, you should try to sleep soon. You have school tomorrow." She looked over Evan's face paint, which he still had yet to wash off. "Excellent job, Evan."

"Y-you should see Connor." Evan rubbed the back of his neck.

"Alright, well I'm going to head to bed." She kissed Evan's cheek. "Goodnight."

"Night Mom," he replied.

"Happy Halloween."


	2. Let's Go Shopping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternate title: EvVan Hansen panics in a Target
> 
> This chapter wasn't suppose to turn out angsty I swear-

Evan and Connor sat on the couch, watching Steven Universe on Evan's laptop. They were watching the season finale. Garnet had just fused back together and was currently fighting Jasper while singing.

Evan sighed contently and rested his head on Connor's shoulder. He reached up and ran his fingers through his hair, getting caught in some tangles.

"So," Connor said, "you know how awhile ago I said that I wanted to know how much you could actually buy with only ten bucks?"

"Yeah," Evan replied, his voice quiet. "What about it?"

"Well." Connor paused the video as the end credits played. "I was thinking that we could do that."

"Go shopping together?" Evan asked, shifting himself so that he could see Connor's face.

"No, go to the zoo together," Connor joked, rolling his eyes and smiling. "Yes, shopping."

"Uh, alright." The blond sat up. "I'll go ask if I can do the shopping this week."

Evan hopped off the couch and ventured into the kitchen where Heidi was making lunch. She insisted that she would take the day off to spend time with Evan despite his protests. He did enjoy spending time with her, but he always thought that her job was more important.

"H-hey mom?" Evan called, walking over to the counter.

"Hmm?" Heidi was cutting a tomato and couldn't look over her shoulder.

"I-I was wondering if I could m-maybe do the grocery sh-shopping this week?" Evan messed with a nearby pen and paper, carelessly scribbling over it. "I-if that's alright."

Heidi set her knife down and wiped her hands on her jeans before turning around. "If you want," she said. "Can I ask why?"

"W-well um. . ." Evan coughed. "Y-you already do so much with y-your job and p-putting up with me." Evan saw how Heidi's expression saddened as he said that last part. A few months ago, after Evan and Connor started dating, Evan decided to tell his mom everything; his depression and how he actually broke his arm. That night was filled with tears and Heidi repeatedly telling him that she loves him, that he's not a burden, that he is the best thing thats ever happened to her.

"I thought you c-could use a break," he continued. He gazed down at the floor. "A-and I feel like it c-could help me with my anxiety."

Heidi smiled, her heart swelling with pride. Evan actually wanted to do something social. On his own!

"Of course honey," Heidi agreed. "If you think it'll help, of course you can do it. I'll have a list ready tomorrow. Now, why don't you bring Connor in here, lunch will be ready soon."

 

Connor and Evan managed to find a parking spot near the Target entrance. They were both baffled at how crowded it can be for a Thursday evening during rush hour.

Getting out of the car, Evan made his way over to Connor. The two walked into the store, hand in hand. Evan was looking at the list while Connor controlled the cart.

"So," Evan said, "we have a budget of a hundred dollars. I spent a while figuring out which things are the most important and which ones are the least important. Toilet paper and laundry detergent are on the top of the list."

"You really thought this through, haven't you?" Connor questioned, leaning forward on the cart.

Evan nodded.

"Let's do this." Connor had one foot on the metal bar on the bottom of the cart and pushed off with the other one. He zoomed down the nearest isle.

Evan ran after him. "W-wait!" he called out. "Please behave yourself."

Connor stopped the cart, looking at his boyfriend. "I'm Connor Murphy, I do the opposite of behave." Seeing the look of uneasiness on his face, Connor sighed. "But fine, I'll behave for you."

Evan smiled and walked away, letting Connor trail behind him. He scanned the isle for toilet paper. He ended up choosing a pack of six rolls.

"Since the list is so long, how about I go look for half of it?" Connor suggested.

Evan bit his lip, looking at the list. He nodded and carefully tore the paper in half, handing it to his boyfriend. "Don't get in trouble," he said as Connor strolled off, "and try to look for sales!"

Connor disappeared down the other isle, leaving Evan alone with the cart. Sighing, he looked back at the list.

_You could find most of this at the Dollar Store. Why didn't we go there instead?_

Someone's cart bumped into him.

"S-sorry," he mumbled, moving out of the way. He avoided eye contact and pushed his own cart down the isle.

The blond scanned the isle while trying to not bump into the person again. He managed to find a few things on the list; cereal, bread, and cereal bars. Unforchanetly, the cheapest cereal was plain Cheerio's. Luckily there was already a lot of sugar at home so Evan wouldn't have to eat flavorless cereal.

The intrusive thoughts flooded his mind as he stepped out of the isle.

_People are looking at you._

_They probably think you walk weird._

_They probably think you're a slob, you're slouching, you're breathing too loudly, you bothered that man back there because you couldn't just move the cart in the first place-_

His head was pounding. His palms were slick with sweat. He tightened his hold on the cart. He was having heart palpitations.

_Why did I do this? This was a mistake. God, I can't even go shopping alone without freaking out. I'm suppose to be an adult. I'm such a disappointment-_

Someone touched his shoulder, making him jump. He faced the person, taking in their appearance. A girl around his age stood in front of him. Her curly blonde hair was just below her shoulder. She was wearing all yellow.

"Are you alright?" she asked.

"I-I'm fine," Evan stuttered, "I'm fine, nothing's wrong I'm just- I'm ok."

She didn't look convinced, but didnt have time to respond because a girl in all purple came up behind her.

"Heather, c'mon," the second girl said, grabbing her hand, lacing their fingers together. "We're gonna be late for the party."

"Oh right," the first girl answered. "I was just making sure he was ok."

"I'm sure he's fine, aren't you?"

It took a while for Evan to realize that she was speaking to him. He nodded frantically, although his heart was still pounding and he was sure they notice how red his face was.

"Now come on."

The two girls left.

Evan leaned against the cart, trying to calm himself down. He closed his eyes, repeating the breathing technique his therapist taught him.

Another hand touched his shoulder. Evan flinched, looking up. Connor stood in front of him, concern etched into his face.

His arms were full of stuff and he put them in the cart before turning to Evan. He put his hands on his shoulders, staring into his boyfriend's eyes. "Are you alright?"

"Y-yeah," Evan said, wincing as his voice cracked. "I-I'm fine. I just, m-my thoughts. . ." He looked away.

"Hey," Connor whispered, gently grabbing the blond's chin and lifting it up. "I get it. We don't have to do this if you don't want to."

"N-no!" Evan exclaimed. He cleared his throat. "I-I mean, no. I have to do this. I told my mom that I would take care of the shopping so that she could rest for a bit a-and sh-she'll be so so so d-disappointed i-if she f-finds out that h-her eighteen-year-o-old son c-can't even shop f-for himself."

"She wouldn't be disappointed," Connor whispered. He wiped away the few tears that slipped past Evan's eyes. "She would understand."

"N-no she wouldn't." Evan folded his arms across his chest. "Sh-she could never understand what it's like to panic attacks for no reason, to suddenly get heart palpitations, to think that you're a burden and that you only annoy people!"

Evan was full on crying now, snot and everything.

"A-and now people are pr-probably s-staring b-because I'm freaking o-out in a f-fucking Target, which makes it worse."

He cried into Connor's shoulder. Connor rubbed circles into his back. He pressed a kiss onto the side of his head.

"Deep breaths, Evan," Connor soothed, "remember: in for five, hold for seven, out for five."

His breathing was shaky, and most of the time he wasn't able to do the technique due to continuous sobs racking his body. Eventually, he calmed down to where he wasn't heavily crying. Tears still escaped and he was shaking, but he was good.

"Lets go," Connor suggested. "We can buy what we have and explain to your mom what happened. I'm sure it'll be fine."

The brunet grabbed Evan's sweaty hands and pulled him close, capturing his lips in a kiss.

Evan squeezed his hands before pulling back, blushing and smiling. He took his hands away, wiping them on his jeans.

Connor lead Evan to the check out isle, one hand on the cart and one hand in Evan's.

"W-when did you get f-fruit snacks?" Evan asked as they unloaded the cart.

"Right after you gave me the list," Connor explained. "Took me twenty minutes to find them. This store is fucking huge."

"I-I was panicking f-for twenty m-minutes?!" Evan exclaimed, eyes widening.

"Shit, you were?" Connor looked at the shorter boy. "I wish I found you sooner."

"I-its fine," Evan mumbled. "Y-you couldn't have known. But anyways, w-we can't afford to pay for the fruit snacks. We have a budget."

"Relax, Ev." Connor placed a hand on his shoulder. "I'm paying for them with my own money."

Evan blushed at the nickname. "O-oh. Ok."

After paying, the couple made their way back to the car.

"Th-thanks for calming me down," Evan said as they got into the car."

"What was I suppose to do? Leave my boyfriend in the store while having a panic attack?"

Evan smiled and planted a kiss on Connor's lips. Connor pulled Evan back, capturing his lips in a kiss. Evan's hands snaked up to Connor's hair and he lightly pulled, making the taller male moan quietly. Connor put one hand on the back of Evan's neck and one on the steering wheel.

The car horn scared them both and they pulled away. Evan had his hands on his chest while Connor was just glaring at the wheel, like it just offended him.

Evan giggled once. Then twice. Then he was full-blown laughing. He held his sides and tears slipped down.

Connor chuckled, starting the car and pulling out of the space.

 

They got to Evan's house quickly. Connor carried the bags, claiming that Evan was still shaking and needed more time to fully cool down. And he insisted that he was stronger, to which Evan denied, stating that he climbs trees and has more upper body strength.

"I'm not saying you're weak," Evan said as he stepped into the house. "I'm just saying that you could barely catch me when I jumped out of the tree."

"Well maybe if you weren't so high up-"

"And who's fault was that?" Evan crossed his arms, smirking.

Connor rolled his eyes, mumbling, "Whatever." He set the four bags on the counter.

Heidi walked downstairs and over to the boys.

"H-hey mom," Evan said, hugging her. "We uhm. . . W-we couldn't get all the groceries."

"Did you run out of money?" Heidi asked, beginning to unload the food from the bags.

"No." Evan dug around in his pocket and pulled out the change he got. He handed the money to her. "I uh, I-I h-had a panic a-attack." He could feel the tears threatening to spill. "S-so we p-paid for what w-we had and l-left."

Heidi engulfed her son in a hug.

"I-I'm sorry, mom," Evan sobbed.

"For what?" Heidi asked, wiping a few tears.

"I-I said that this w-would help me and th-that you would get a break. B-but I j-just made things worse-" like I always do- "and n-now y-you have to go get the rest because I couldn't. And you're already overworked and I just. . . You're probably disappointed. You shouldn't have to worry about me, you're job is more important."

Heidi sucked in a breath. "Evan," she said, pulling back and looking directly into Evan's eyes. "You are the most important thing in my life. You are so much more important than my job. I could never be disappointed in you."

It took him a while to calm down again. He and Heidi stood there, not letting go of each other. Connor stood awkwardly off to the side.

"I love you," Heidi said, "so much."

"I-I love you too mom."

"And I'm so proud of you."

"I know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternate title #2: spot that Heathers reference
> 
> I totally ship Veronica and Heather McNamara
> 
> Mmmmm projecting yourself onto characters is Fun™

**Author's Note:**

> The Babadook and the Sixth Sense are really good movies. You should watch them.
> 
> This scene seemed longer when I first wrote it to be honest


End file.
